Sunday, October 18, 2009
....aaaand, we're back
it didn't work out with he and i, and last night i was stressing / having some regret about having fallen off the wagon. but you know what, i spent some time feeding my soul and connecting with a new person, and that's important too.
it also has not helped at all that the nice warm "inspire me to run" weather has been replaced by cold, wet, yucky fall. minus the wet i think I can still run in it, i will have to make it my priority to get some weather appropriate clothes. and / or start thinking more seriously about either joining a gym or finding some other way of doing fitness indoors.
other thoughts i've had recently were that i hate the large amount of "airtime" that food gets in my consciousness. its like i'm always thinking about what i will be eating next or what i've eaten last, how healthy it is or is not, and basically just freaking out about it. i know the solution to this is to plan ahead and thats what i plan to do. bought some chicken thighs and butternut squash (frozen - no peeling!) to roast for dinners this week, turkey for lunch, and oatmeal for breakfast. have yogurt, rice cakes and almond butter (new accidental discovery - major yum!) for snacks. so even if i don't blog every day, that's what i'll be eating. until my cousin's wedding this weekend which will be a whole other fiasco ;-)
this morning i made apple cinnamon oatmeal with a fresh apple from when we went apple picking a couple of weeks ago. plus a strong cup of new england macadamia nut coffee with milk (I had been hoping they'd have pumpkin coffee but this one is pretty tasty). i feel satisfied and energized to write that paper for my symbiosis class :)
Sunday, October 4, 2009
argh too much is going on...
Today I went out for brunch with Carolyn. I tried grits with cheddar cheese - they were good! We split banana bread pancakes with coconut butter and italian sausage scrambled egg quesadillas. Went apple picking, had yummy apples. For dinner I made garlic ginger fried rice with fresh green beans and TJ's carne asada. This should last for 4-5 meals.
Tomorrow I need to go into the lab at 6am, then go to a meeting in Worcester. Tomorrow night my plan is to make red wine cupcakes. Oye. Need to finish all my Tuesday homework tonight in order to accomplish that.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
a few days have passed
I realized in therapy today that I have anxiety asssociated with getting back into exercising because I made the assocation, subconsciously, between the 5 mile run and the rotten cold. I'm glad to have realized it because I will try to be more aware of these things and be gentler with my body.
Today was a better eating day. Skipped breakfast which wasn't great. Had a salad and Sunchips for lunch. TJ's stir fry veggie shrimp stir fry and brown rice (leftover from the awesome dinner I made on Monday night for Brian: porkchops on the bone stuffed with lemon sage butter, brown rice, broccoli, and flourless chocolate cake for dessert. Of which I ate about 4 pieces... oops!)
I feel like if the day was longer (as in, not dark at 7) and not quite as chilly, I could have ran today. I am going to try to go for a run tomorrow morning. If I get to bed early enough tonight, that will be the goal. So off to work to finish up my homework and hopefully get to bed before 10 :)
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Today recognizing the importance of balancing, being grateful for my health and respecting my health. Still fighting a cold. Having some good strong coffee and a cinnamon roll at city feed. Want to run later but if I can't, will walk. Have soooo much work to do, but took this hour anyway to chill as I think it is important after the frenetic nature of yesterday.
Monday, September 21, 2009
yeah, i dunno
breakfast - mini lunabar, 1 pc toast with pb some canteloupe and mandarin orange
lunch - asian chicken salad (yum) and chicken chipotle sandwich from panera (also v. good) but was focused on convo did not have time to eat
snack- granola bar
snack - wheat thins
d - some cheese + crackers, peanut noodles w/ chicken, lima beans & corn
around 10pm had more cheese and crackers
feed a cold starve a fever?
feeling down on myself. on the good side, got table cleaned off and dishwasher sorted out. tomorrow is another day.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
also
5 MILES BABY!
Only at one point (on Centre St. on the way home) did I feel discouraged, and that was slight.
Have not blogged in days. Wed went out with Mal & Bunny, had 2 glasses of wine (Estancia zinfandel, very good) and Asian potstickers with sticky rice at Parrish. Thursday went out with Brian to Ivy.. had he pork with chocolate sauce sounds weird but was very, very good. Risotto / orange appetizer thing was delicious too. Friday had TJ's quesadilla for lunch, made in toaster oven, v. good for a frozen quesadilla, had cheese + crackers and wine for dinner (wanted Estancia but they didn't have it, got Joel Gott instead which was quite good). Had half a bottle of wine + a gin and tonic on Friday night. Yesterday Andrew came over and we made crepes for breakfast... one savory, filled with scrambled egg and harvarti dill cheese, with chicken sausage on the side, and one sweet, filled with strawberries and chocolate ganche (made an easy chocolate ganache mixing baker' chocolate, whole milk, and 1 tsp sugar over a double boiler). Went to Wonderspice for Thai for dinner. Got the mango curry which was disappointing.
Today went to the Allston street fair and tried a variety of interesting street fair food. No funnel cakes here... they had salad and gourmet sherbet and vegetarian asian food (interesting but not motivated to go to the restaurant).
I am totally a foodie. I love food. I think I can cultivate that without guilt as long as I keep up the physical activity.
This week the goal will be to eat yogurt every day. I really feel like I lost more weight the weeks I ate yogurt than the weeks I didn't. Of course can't know this for sure since I'm not weighing myself.
One thing I realized this week is that I am starting to say no to plans, or make creative changes to plans, in order to eat better and save money. I can't remember exactly when I turned down plans, but I know I did it. Making crepes was an example of adapting plans to save money... instead of spending $18 each on brunch at Centre St cafe (delicious though it is) we spent $12 total on crepe ingredients.
Maybe tomorrow I will go to a yoga class either instead of or in addition to running.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
loooong day
today was snacky snack snack day... could do this better by having lower calorie snacks maybe available. also dont need to be eating dinner now at 10:30 but damnit i feel like i am entitled to dinner
b- cheerios & chocolate miniwheats
l - grilled chicken salad w/ spinach and asian viniagrette (yum!)
s- coffee & milk, more cereal
s- cashews - (160 cal, small pack)
s- cookies & wheat thins in class
d- risotto (am going to try not to repeat the TJ's pizza fiasco)
tomorrow am supposed to meet m at 9pm... have therapy meeting till 7:30 and really want to squeeze a run in. can i do it? i think i can if i bring clothes to change into at therapy, go right from there to run and run all the way home, take a quick shower. tomorrow's run will be about speed.
Monday, September 14, 2009
ran 4.1 miles!
ate a super yummy spinach and grilled chicken salad (seriously, seriously in love with Trader Joe's. Their grilled chicken tastes like actual CHICKCEN and not that fake processed crap). Did put real ranch dressing on it, hey had to do something to feel satisfied if eating a dinner with no carbs. Let's see if I'm hungry in an hour. If I get my homework done by 10 I MIGHT treat myself to JP Licks - I've resisted the temptation many times and if ever there were a day I deserved it, it would be today. I'd have to walk down there though.
a small, but significant success
Its been less than a month and already visible signs of progress. At this rate (although I don't want to get my hopes up too high) I could realistically be into a size 10 by December.
B- cheerios
S- fruit, peanut butter, & toasted coconut (I have to find out what kind of peanut butter they use, it is awesome)
L- salad & 1 slice pizza (successfully held off on second slice!)
S- sm piece of pita bread and hummus.
Kind of feels like I ate a lot today. Want to work towards eating lighter. Will probably have a grilled chicken salad for dinner. Also, planning to add some distance to my run, and change things up a bit, by going down the J-way after I go around the pond. Put all of my itunes onto my ipod and am enjoying that... it might even be better to run when the music is not so frenetic.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
delicious fruit salad
got pizza and salad for dinner and made a fruit salad for dessert - TJ's mango (delish) a ripe grapefruit from TJ (also delish), peach, and banana. i call it sunset fruit salad. and i am excited to make it for myself with some peanut butter and coconut.
yea~
today breakfast had coffee and TJ's smoked salmon crepes (not fantastic but worth trying... will cook in a pan next time). lunch had TJ's chicken sausage on whole wheat toast and a bunch of edamame. may likely have a snacky snack this afternoon while studying, and pizza for dinner.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
mmm strata
today - bfast - toast with jelly, butter, & peanut butter, & coffee. went to brunch and had delicious strata with side salad. will do some homework then run later
Thursday, September 10, 2009
can you eat a whole pizza? i can
today was okay for most of the day... for breakfast had fruit, peanut butter, and toasted coconut from the breakfast bar - really tasty! - had a yogurt for snack and big salad with cheddar cheese and balsamic viniagrette for lunch. after class got some wheat thin crisps from the vending machine for a snack. didn't get to run as was going to C's to watch Project Runway. But since I was in that neck of the woods did my grocery shopping at Trader Joe's (woot!) multigrain chips and salsa were my dinner. yeah i coulda done a better job than that.
am stressing because no time to run again at least until saturday, and maybe not then. THANK GOODNESS i ran yesterday!
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
bringing lunch is important
bfast - peach yogurt (prob wouldn't get again, but nice attempt)
bought lunch - buffalo chicken wrap which was really quite tasty but i should have eaten half, not the whole thing. and some chips, many of which i tossed
snack - 2 spring rolls
dinner - half a TJ's spinach and feta pizza (hopefully also tasty, haven't eaten it yet)
skipped meeting to run today.. intended to go to the pond but it was major sketch where there are no lights. ran the bike path along the side of the road instead (was psyched to find out that it is 3.4 miles out and back!) during the winter when it gets dark early i'll either have to do my pond runs on weekend days or find a running buddy.
run wasn't bad. for the first time did some "sprinting" along the last few blocks. that was awesome.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
some not so great eating days
breakfast today was oatmeal with raisins & brown sugar. potluck lunch so had a big plateful of things pasta-cheesy-meatball-sausage oriented (nice to have a dose of comfort food) then had a chocolate mint brownie, a piece of flan cake, also had 3 fried spring rolls (1 at lunch and 2 as a snack later)
tried to get by on an energy bar instead of dinner but got home from class really hungry so made a chicken burger on whole wheat. really need to get that george foreman grill up here, or in the meantime get pam because i know i am ingesting a lot of needless extra calories by cooking everything in olive oil.
did manage to throw my clothes in the wash (running stuff was getting really stinky, need to buy some extra!) and planning to run when i get home from the awis meeting even though it will be pretty late.
Monday, September 7, 2009
ran 12.5 minute miles today!
yesterday ate bagel, smoked salmon and cream cheese for breakfast. went out for cocktails (had 2) and shared calamari, felt good that i was able to hold back from really eating the calamari, really only had a few. went to dinner and had the most amazing hawaiian maranated smoky juicy steak i've ever had. for all the struggles i've had with food lately (and for as long as i can remember) THIS was totally worth it. shared a bottle of wine with L.
today had 2 pieces of toast, 1 with hummus and one with peanut butter, so far that's been it. going to dinner.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
L's visiting
went running, it was hot out and tough having skipped wednesday. i was slow and i walked a bit, but i finished up okay.
didn't eat dinner. Had 6 beers and 2 sangrias. then ate mcdonalds around midnight.
today so far have had egg & cheese on a coissaint (left off the bacon, that counts for something right?) 2 iced coffees... just got something small when we went to rattlesnake - an avocado lobster appetizer and the cornbread (which, unfortunately was not that good) for dinner ordered a bbq chicken sandwich with cheese and a greek salad.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
a good day
snack - yogurt
lunch - turkey & hummus on wheat, sunchips
snack - honey roasted peanuts
dinner - some middle eastern pizza thing, iced coffee with milk
walked ~3 miles around cambridge
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
ugh didnt run today
breakfast - coffee, milk, bagel with little bit of cream cheese and smoked salmon
lunch - turkey on wheat with hummus, chips. diet dr. pepper
snack - crackers and hummus
dinner - pan seared tuna with garlic and chili pepper flakes, pasta (not a ton this time!)
late night snack - chocolate frosted miniwheats and skim milk.
running on Friday and Sunday!
bleh
This is clearly a mind over matter thing. What is the root of the eating at night and how do I get past it?
Its such a weird thing because the drive to offer my body the instant gratification that it wants is so intense.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
I had to have that second serving of Pasta Roni...
But maybe, just maybe, having a nice filling dinner (even if it did include copious amounts of Pasta Roni) will stave off the snacking fixation later.
Overall the day went pretty well:
Breakfast: coffee / milk, 2 slices whole wheat toast with 1 oz cheese
Lunch - came home had chicken burger cooked in olive oil over cabbage & shredded carrot with TJ's peanut viniagrette (LOVE that stuff)
Snacks - yogurt & crackers
Dinner - Pan seared tuna with peas, pasta roni, and TJ's SP Viniagrette.
And now I don't want to do dishes.
Monday, August 31, 2009
I. Am. Exhausted.
Got up with just enough time to get to the lab- *ALMOST* overslept as I pressed "dismiss" instead of "snooze". Yikes!
Managed to bring lunch stuff but did not bring breakfast.
So breakfast = 2/3 of a toasted whole wheat bagel from the caf + coffee and milk (note to self: bagels from the caf are dry, gummy, and basically so not worth it)
that filled me up so I didn't need a morning snack.
lunch = turkey on wheat with hummus + salad with caesar dressing and croutons (was craving them...)
snack = yogurt, some pecans, and some wheat crackers
Just got back from my run and am not hungry now but will heat up something easy if I get hungry later on. It was tough to get motivated to run because I was so tired, but when I got going I was ok. Circiling left is always harder than circling right. I did mange the extra quarter loop and back. Had more back pain. Breathed through it but need to figure out how to address it before longer runs.
OK, gonna force myself to shower.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Just another Sunday
It was a good day too... I put on clothes and noticed they fit slightly better and I look good!
Tired from a loooong day but in brief:
Got up, had coffee, went to the lab. After lab went to Java Jo's for a toasted bagel with lox and a little bit of cream cheese. Yummy and they don't have super huge bagels so I didn't feel over-stuffed.
Snack of 1 slice whole wheat bread and hummus, which I ate in the car on the way back from the store as I undertook a 3 hour long project to make Dulce de Leche cake for Chris' birthday (which resulted in a good amount of sugar consumption but was delicious)
Had dinner at Chris' - a beer, salad with strawberries and goat cheese, his french chicken-in-a-pot with au jus, and bread. Then a glass of wine and a slice of my fabulous cake.
And now, its 1am and I'm just getting to bed, to get up for lab at 7:30 am. Running tomorrow! I plan to run an extra quarter of a lap around the pond and turn around, just to feel out the increased distance.
My house is kind of a disaster, need to address that tomorrow.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Running in the rain...
I continue to feel some upper back / lower neck pain which seems to be associated with being hunched forward... I spent less energy trying to keep my shoulders up and back than I did the last run and the pain was less prominent than it was the last run. Maybe I was creating more pressure by overcompensating.
Lastly I felt the beginnings of a side cramp (looong time since I've felt that when running) which I breathed through without too much problem.
After my run I had a snack of tortilla and a glass of skim milk.
I didn't have the energy to make the tuna steak, so I just reheated tortellini which needed to get eaten anyway. I steamed some broccoli in the microwave and added just a little bit of butter (like half a teaspoon) just for the flavor and salt.
Now to attempt an evening home alone trying not to eat out of boredom (If I feel hungry, I will eat something, hopefully not peanut butter out of the jar....)
disaster
We went to On the Border which, all things considered, could have been worse. I had 2 margaritas, some chips and salsa, and we split an order of popcorn shrimp, which I didn't have much of and wasn't that big in the first place. But then over the course of the night I had 5 more beers - 3 pints and 2 bottles, and then we went back to Mal's house where we ate probably almost a whole jar of salsa con queso (I was afraid to look) with chips, and I also ate a slice of DiGiornio pizza.
Today getting back on track, while bumming that my camping trip (and associated trail run) has been rained out. Left Mal's at 7 to go to the lab, stopped at Starbucks for an iced coffee with milk and apple bran muffin. Was hungry when I got back home at 11 so made a yummy peanut noodle dish with spaghetti, peanut butter, and spicy peanut viniagrette. Not the healthiest thing in the world due to all the fat int he peanut butter, and I also could have had a smaller portion. But I was craving comfort hangover food and I think this was a better option than say, nachos. I also am excited that I can make a tasty, easy, peanut sauce and I'm pretty sure mine is lighter than the one I had from Center St. Cafe (although that is so, so delicious). I'm planning a very light and healthy dinner: a spicy tuna steak and steamed broccoli. Also, today will be my first run in the rain (unless it stops before I get out there). Need to get some new tunes as Jen's Superfantastic playlist is getting kinda old.
Friday, August 28, 2009
yesterday
To the best of my memory yesterday I ate:
breakfast - cereal, blueberries, skim milk and coffee for breakfast
snack - yogurt
lunch - leftover pasta and sauce as well as thai cabbage and carrot slaw with peanut viniagrett
snack - hummus and crackers
snack later - a handful of pecans
dinner - popcorn and 2 glasses of white wine
I ran yesterday, it was NOT nearly as good of a run as on Tuesday. My legs felt like treetrunks, and I had soreness in my neck (my boss says this is because I don't stand up straight enough while running)
Today has been 'eh' so far... I had toast and hummus for breakfast, 2 iced coffees with milk, and we went out for lunch where I had a beer and like 4 big boneless buffalo chicken fingers with blue cheese. I looooove buffalo chicken fingers but I still feel full now 4 hours later. Might skip dinner tonight.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
morning
Yesterday was an off day for running.
Breakfast: cereal, blueberries, skim milk, coffee
Snack: cheese & crackers
Lunch: veggie burger, hummus, whole wheat
Snack: Broccoli & hummus
Dinner: Pesto tortellini, sauce, glass of red wine
Dessert: some ice cream
Would have avoided the ice cream if I could. Found one glass of red wine to be just the right "relaxing" amount. Am happy to know that I have the self control to just drink one glass!
Running goal for later today: make it all the way around the pond. I want to do that next week too and then I'll add more distance.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
I had ice cream for dinner today
Breakfast: blueberries and dry cheerios. Iced coffee with milk
Snack: blueberry yogurt
Lunch: veggie burger, 1 oz cheese on whole wheat
Snack: crackers and hummus
Then Marcia suggested JP Licks after work. How could I turn that down on such a gorgeous summer day? I suggested we walk to JP Licks and stuck to my plan to run later that evening. I got a kiddie size oatmeal cookie frozen yogurt with mini chocolate chips... yum.
Now, my run on Sunday had been tough, and I was uncertain of my ability to reach my goal of running to the pond and halfway around it before walking. Well I BLEW MY GOAL OUT OF THE WATER. I ran ALL the way around the pond and only stopped twice briefly on the run back from the pond.
I seriously can't tell if it was the cooler weather, the sugar charge from the ice cream, or the combination of both that made the run go easier. Seriously contemplating eating ice cream more often if that's what it takes to get me going...
While running and thinking through the guilt associated with the unplanned ice cream, I decided I would allow myself a light meal when I got home when and if I felt hungry. I did wind up feeling hungry a short while after returning, so I made Trader Joe's spicy peanut slaw recipe, which is shredded carrots, shredded cabbage, and their spicy peanut viniagrette. It was fantastic! Crispy, peanut-y and spicy, totally satisfying. AND the spice made me want to drink an additional glass of water (I had a bottle immediately after my run). Speaking of spicy, Marcia, who is apparently a yogurt freak, suggested adding spices to plain yogurt, as one would to sour cream, to make a healthier vegetable dip. I don't really like plain yogurt but am definitely willing to give this a try.
So I'm feeling really good.
Today was something of a rough day at work and while musing on my run it occurred to me that the last time I was focused fitness I was not happy with the job I had at the time. I have his weird (slightly irrational) fear that with only so much total energy to expend, if I start devoting some to fitness, I will not have the energy to feel fullfilled in other aspects of my life. Not sure what to do with that one... but hoping to prove it wrong by experience.
Monday, August 24, 2009
First full day
Snack: 5 whole wheat crackers with 1 oz cheese (it was good! wanted more but was able to keep it in check...)
Lunch: Mushroom veggie burger on whole wheat bread and hummus, raw broccoli with hummus
Snack: Fudge
Snack: 4 oz vanilla yogurt
And then it goes downhill as I went out to dinner...
I had a beer, a cup of chowder with oyster crackers (sooo good) and I ordered broiled scallops which came with salad and fries... this was good but I only ate about half as the chowder was really filling. Then we went out to a bar where I had a glass of red wine. And I HAD to end the night with something sweet so I had some ice cream with chocolate crackle when I came home.
That was today.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Sunday night
After the meeting headed over to Trader Joe's and did my shopping for the week. I CAN'T BELIEVE how much variety they have and how inexpensive it is! I left with ingredients for dinners for at least a week and a half to two weeks. I wonder how the quality is... I will find out tomorrow.
I prepped stuff for lunches (actually 2-3 small meals throughout the day) and was quite proud of myself. I even portioned out cheese. This is actually really easy to do, you just cut an 8 oz block in half and cut the half in half twice. You're left with a nice one ounce cube, which is NOT as depressing of a tiny serving as it may sound. Although we'll see if I'm left either a) eating more than one cube or b) going nuts trying to avoid eating more than one cube tomorrow.
Between the heat and exercising today, have drank a TON of water today, which is awesome.
My friend just got back from Europe and texted me to go to dinner tomorrow. This means I won't have time to run tomorrow as I had originally planned, and I will be eating out and drinking instead of eating my healthy Trader Joe's goodies. But I've planned for healthy eating throughout the day and maybe I'll try to get a walk in at lunch. Running will resume on Tuesday. On Tuesday my goal is to make it all the way to the pond and then halfway around it before stopping to walk.
2 addendums to today's post
2) May adapt the goal as follows (which actually makes more sense): Be a size 10 and run a 10K in 2010... I found a race in San Diego in Jan, 2010 and I looooove San Diego... so...
It begins...
On vacation this past week I went running twice and biking once. More activity in a week than I had undertaken in months. AND I came back home still motivated. As I was running around the pond this random idea occured to me- 10^3, or ten cubed. I want to be a size 10, and run a 10K in the 10th month (Even though I realized later that it is technically the 12th month, I had December in my head... "DEC" means 10 right?) My plan is to find a place that's nice and warm in December, perfect for a race, and buy a plane ticket there. My pride will not let me wimp out on a race that I paid several hundred dollars to run.
So I'm doing it. I'm kind of hoping training for the race will eclipse the annoyance of attempting to moderate my eating habits. Not totally sure yet whether or not to weigh myself on a regular basis. Slightly too neurotic for me. I'd rather just watch my sizes. I'm currently a size 14 and I can't remember ever having been a size 10... I think I skipped from kids sizes directly to plus sizes. But I'm certain that I can do it. If I don't go down a size in a month I will probably reevaluate this tactic.
I will use this blog to record what I eat, my training, and how I'm doing.
Today I popped on the ipod and ran down to the pond, ran / walked around the pond, and walked back. I felt FANTASTIC after my run / walk.
So far today I've consumed an iced coffee with skim milk, veggie burger on two slices of whole wheat toast, and reheated chicken & veggie sautee with romano cheese. Its weird and hard to be alone in my house all day with few options for things to do, and of them, eating being a constant temptation. On the plus side being relatively broke at present moment I can and will limit my grocery shopping to healthy necessities. The hardest things for me are a) portion control and b) eating out... again being broke should help minimize the latter for the time being. As for portion control, I will have to experiment a bit. I will start by making sure to eat six small meals a day, upping the fiber and nutrient content of what I eat, and drinking more water (sometimes when you think you're hungry, you're really thirsty, right?)
Thinking of buying a bike. I've had this irrational fear of bike riding for several years now, perhaps because of the crazy Boston drivers and shit that I've heard happens to bikers who get in their way. But I rented a bike on vacation and it was great. My plan is to wait until I catch up on my bills to make the purchase. Oh, and after I buy my plane ticket to the sunny and warm location of a 10K race in December!